December, the season of goodwill to all men and all those other seemingly poetic notions. Admittedly, in the past, I have been somewhat dedicated to the insertion of Christmas cheer, but, in truth, these last few years have slowly but surely seen me lose all connection to the holidays and now, it appears I am the epitome of the Grinch.
I think, in part, it's mostly to do with my annoyance that a large part of society don't seem to take this loving feeling and implement it into their daily lives, all year round. I mean, why do we need an excuse to be kind and generous? Surely that should be our daily mantra! Equally, I don't want to have to feel socially pressured to do anything, especially things such as gift giving or card sending and I particularly hate the idea of forcing myself to be 'merry' and spend time with or speak to 'family', whom for the most part, act like complete strangers for the other 364 fucking days of the year.
My previous enjoyment of the holidays have really always come down to simply a vibe; watching Christmas movies, cooking up a feast and generally feeling a little warmer inside, but in truth, I feel as though, over the past few years, I've woken up to a lot of life's illusions; the things that are so engrained in our lives, that we stop questioning them and because of that, I really just can't reconnect with my old thinking anymore. Okay yes, it's true, I'm a complete over-thinker, but honestly, I'd rather that, than be asleep, living out of habit, unconsciously repeating myself.
I mean, you know that come down you feel when you know the holidays are over and you witness the tree coming down? Yeah, that. I truly believe, that if you filled your everyday life with merriment, you'd happily remove the tinsel and start getting excited about January and if you did more of what you loved throughout the year, I reckon you'd almost look forward to heading back to work, because you'd probably be making money doing something fulfilling, not just something that paid the bills.
I think the reason why I find the holidays hard and in truth, I do, is because I see how people change, how they come together, how they cling so fiercely to those few weeks of festive fueled happiness and it reminds me of how many people still haven't worked out, that the other eleven months of the year should feel like that.
If you enjoy what you read, please feel free to share it with others.