This past week has been rather hectic & somewhat turbulent. Tears, tantrums, sleepless nights, housing issues, you name it, it has seemingly been thrown in my face. Whilst for the main part, all the lessons from the past year have provided me with a rock hard core of self belief, which is unshaken by all the drama, I have to admit that yesterday I just fell spectacularly apart.
Sometimes, no matter how much you believe & no matter how much positivity you possess, you simply just reach your limit. Cycling back from a late night jivamukti class, I started to go over everything in my head. These next six weeks are about to be the toughest few weeks of my life. They equate to a C class vinyasa with Victoria (fellow Yellow Yogis will appreciate this). You feel as though you simply can't go on, it's too hard, you just might crumble mid crow & die on your mat, but then, ninety minutes later, you realise, you made it & you feel kick-ass afterwards.
Falling asleep last night, eyes sodden, heart aching, hope somewhat lost, I left my troubles behind, for a world of dreams & when I woke, suddenly something had shifted & I felt the positivity had returned. I think sometimes, you just have to reach your lowest point & be entirely drained, in order to finally refuel & have the strength to pick yourself back up & push yourself forward. Right now, I need to persevere & make it through this next little chapter, because I know that on the other side of all this trauma, is so much ease & happiness, that it will all be worth it.
So back on a super positive vibe, I am looking forward & there is much ahead to be excited about! Firstly my birthday on Saturday! I'm hoping the weather is going to be kind, as I would like to go to the Botanischer Garten during the day, with friends & cycle round the blossoming gardens, snapping up the florals! Then, if there is time, I would love to have a picnic, or BBQ at Templehofer, the abandoned airport, finally treat myself to some vegan crepes from either Oh La La or Let It Be & eventually end the evening with more food, if we're not already stuffed, over at Bite Club, if it's on. Florals & food, my perfect birthday combination.
Secondly, my Berlin best & super talented friend, Miss Katie Chappell, has agreed to hop on the Oui Je T'aime Aussi boat & will be providing illustrations for the site! If you're not already aware of her wonderful work, be sure to check out her website! I am very excited by this collaboration, especially as I openly admit to not being the best photographer in the world & it pains me not to be able to sufficiently share my surroundings with you. We shall be working on a host of new things, along with some other collaborators, including guides to eateries & places to go in Berlin, which we are also looking to turn into a zine that will be available to purchase!
Nothing makes me happier than when I am in my creative element! Which is why I am also very happy to be working with a few online publications, contributing articles, which once published, I will also share with you. Most importantly of all, my current focus is getting my book published! I won't go into great detail about it, as I want to keep it close to my chest, but it will be my greatest achievement to finally get it out there & I will be sure to spam you with information when the ink is dry & the pages printed!
So realistically, there is much to be done & much to be excited about & for today, I am absorbing all the positive energy around me & using it constructively & proactively! Keep happy guys!
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